I was attacked this week. Were you?
I was spiritually attacked by the enemy. He works so hard to get us to quit doing God’s will.
During my Bible study today(Beth Moore-her studies are awesome-I highly suggest. Yes Regina, all these years you were right!!!), anyway our topic hit right on for the week I had had. On a side note, the last two weeks we had to go ahead two weeks because we couldn’t find the next dvd. So today we went back and did the two lessons we skipped-God’s timing???? Anyway, she made a statement about satan and how he works. The enemy will do everything he can to get us to quit, then he turns around and makes us feel even worse by calling us quitters and cowards. You’ve heard that voice, right?
I am thankful to my Lord for my growing strength in Him-and for those of you that I leaned on and cried on a shoulder. I got through my discouragement and am back on track.
Our lesson today was all about goodness-a fruit of the Holy Spirit. Her main point is that this fruit of goodness is always doing; actively benefiting someone else. This is something God has been opening my heart to for awhile now. I have realized my great desire to bring Him glory and to do what He wants of me. Do you realize that God made a to-do list for your life before you were even born? Ephesians 2:10 “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”
I have read that before but it means something now-now that I want to know what God’s to-do list is for my life. I am saddened to think of how long I have lived already and how many things I have not done on that list. What have I missed?
Beth talked about our culture of being self-absorbed, how easy it is for us to get bored. How much trouble do people get into because of pure boredom? Well, as she said in her southern twang and right to the point “they don’t have enough to do”. There is plenty to do in God, we all need to seek what God’s to-do list is for our individual life. We are all made different, with different passions and gifts, so our lists(good works) will be different from each other. And remember He knew what our good works would be before we were born!!! Isn’t that cool?
So back to my attack-this whole lesson today of course had me crying like a baby. (yes I know, I cry a lot these days)But I felt God was telling me the whole time that I was right where He wanted me to be and that I was working on my to-do list. I might not have handled my attack as bravely as I should have, but I didn’t get up and run like I wanted to.
So to close, the coolest thing God showed me today(via Beth) was found in righIsaiah 58:8 “Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard.” The whole scripture you should read is verses 6-11, but for space I only wrote the one verse. She called this scripture a prescription for our life-God’s promise when we “spend ourselves” on others.
I loved all the promises but the last part about the Lord being our rear guard is what I believe God really wanted me to “see” today. Of course we see that as a way of God saying “I got your back”, and believe me I’m thankful for that. But listen to what the Hebrew meaning of “rear guard” is-to gather in, collect…as in harvest.
So God goes behind us(rear guard) and does the gathering when we plant the seeds(good works). We don’t need to look back and see if there is a harvest-that is His job. So when I was attacked I started telling myself that I could never make a difference in others’ lives-but it’s not my job to bring in the harvest. I am just to plant the seeds and keep looking forward. We can get discouraged when we try to look back and see if any of our seeds are growing. Just keep planting-that’s our job.
So what’s your to-do list? And are you doing it?
Friday, August 29, 2008
Saturday, August 23, 2008
The Average Jane Journal #14 - Is There Joy In Your Life?

I am writing this with tears still streaming down my face-don’t worry, nothing bad has happened. I just finished watching The Bucket List, and pretty much cried like a baby through most of it. I loved the beautiful friendship and genuine love that was formed between the two main characters.
This morning before watching the movie I had been thinking about writing a quick journal entry asking for prayer. I woke up feeling so overwhelmed of all the need that I see around me. There is so much to pray for, so many hurts and needs in the lives of all the people I care about.
So after my heart was breaking about more things to pray for amidst my circle of people in my life, I woke up feeling overwhelmed. I felt like I needed help, that maybe I couldn’t do it-“feeling” is just too much for me. I am always questioning myself and how I’m doing on this new journey God has put me on-I’m sure there is someone much better for the job.
So anyway, back to the movie. I don’t know if you have seen the movie-which I do suggest, it’s very touching. And I’m not going to pretend it’s some scriptural, faith based movie-but of course the subject of death always brings up faith questions; no matter what you’re belief is.
But one scene in the movie was very eye opening to me, and helped me deal with my original thoughts I had when I woke up. The two characters are in Egypt, looking at pyramids. One of them tells of an Egyptian belief about two questions they are asked when they die. Their answers to the questions determine whether they go to Heaven or not.
Now first let me say, I am not writing about that belief-I do not believe that. Entry into Heaven is through faith in Jesus Christ only. But the two questions were awesome questions, that we can use in how we live our lives on this earth.
The questions are “Have you found joy in your life?” and “Has your life brought joy to others?”. I can just imagine Jesus asking those questions. That pretty much boils down to what our lives should be. As believers we should find joy in our life through Jesus, and the fact that our names are written in the book of life-our reservation is already made, no matter what happens here on earth.
And the second question, would carry out the commandment of loving others. If others find joy through our lives, we must have loved!!!! And maybe led others on that path that leads them to their own joy in Jesus Christ.
So, my feelings are totally different from this morning. Yes, I still feel overwhelmed but I realized I am finding joy in being on this new journey and praying for people I care about. It has been my desire to be used by God, and to bring Him glory and I believe He has put me where He wants me. Even if that is just to pray for people that probably have no one else that prays for them. Seeing God in little moments recently in my life has been JOY.
So my answer to the first question is definitely YES-not only my joy in MY salvation but joy in realizing I am where God wants me to be. We are never promised an easy life this side of Heaven, just a companion to live it with us. So when I feel overwhelmed, I must remember I’m not alone.
The second question I assume is not meant for us to answer about ourselves. Maybe that’s a question meant only for others to answer about us. But you know what? Not for my glory, but for God’s, I do want the answer to that question to be yes about my own life someday and hopefully I will continue to strive for that-even in the littlest ways; wherever God leads me.
And yes, I’m still crying.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
The Average Jane Journal #13 - Are You Holding Onto A Wound?

Wounds or Scars??
(I just want to give credit where credit is due. Most of the information in this entry came from a Beth Moore study that I just had. It was so powerful to me, that I wanted to share it.)
Hebrews 5:7 “During the days of Jesus’ life on earth, he offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the one who could save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverant submission.”
Are you holding onto a wound? Why do we choose to do that? I know from experience that I have held onto wounds. Even though it made me miserable, it became a part of me. I didn’t want to let it go, I felt like I had the right to hold onto it. Writing that down makes me realize how crazy that sounds, but I don’t know how else to explain it. I’m sure at least some of you know what I’m trying to explain. There are also other types of wounds that we “forget” we have. We don’t really know they are still a problem in our lives till something happens and we realize that wound is still there.
No matter the type of wound, if it is still open and bloody then God cannot turn that wound into a scar. We need to let God start healing that wound, we need to bow down to God in this pain. Just give it to him and if you have to, then use “loud cries and tears”. Bow down to God, submit to Him in your pain and tears. I’m sure you have experienced your own children running to you with “loud cries and tears”, so too does our Heavenly Father want us to run to Him. Go to God with your rawest emotions, be honest about your pain.
Psalm 147:3 “He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds.”
The Hebrew word for “wounds” means “pain, wound, sorrow, affliction, grievance.”
The Hebrew word for “binding” means “to bind, to wrap around, cover, envelope, enclose.” Isn’t that cool to think of God doing each of these meanings!!! Don’t you just want to be enclosed in His arms? God does not wish for us to be in pain, he wants to take away our wounds. He loves us so much, He created us-why would he want us to go through life with an open wound?!
Psalm 46:10 “Be still, and know that I am God;….”
Wounds need binding and binding takes time. At this time in the study Beth brought out a big ole’ teddy bear sitting in a chair. She wanted to give us a visual of being still while God wraps our wounds. With the teddy bear in the chair, she began to lovingly wrap bandages around its arm and foot.
Are you giving God the time to work you through your wound? Submit, bow down to God. We don’t have to be in pain forever. We can and need to let it go. Our wounds need binding. Spend some time with the Lord and deal with your wounds. You’re stopping God from working in ALL areas of your life. We need to trust God that something on the other side of that healing is something glorious. We need to let God minister to us, so He can minister through us.
That’s where our scars come in. In a physical wound, when it heals there is a scar. It is not bloody or open anymore. The same with our “inside” wounds, after healing comes a scar. Scars show the other side of healing. Sometimes the scar goes away, but usually in a really big wound we keep that scar. That scar can be our ministry to others. We can show someone else our scar and share with them how God healed your wound. Our scars can bring someone else hope. Just think of doubting Thomas and how Jesus’ scars brought him hope by touching them. Let others “touch” your scars if you can bring someone hope.
The God of All Comfort 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.”
Life is hard. Life hurts. Life breaks. But God binds our wounds if we give them to Him. What wounds do you have that are hindering God’s work in your life? Do you have wounds or scars?
Do you have any idea how much God loves you friend? I believe that the act of binding our wounds brings God such joy. I’m not saying God likes for us to be in pain, but His joy is felt in being able to express His love to you as He is “bandaging” you and “enveloping” You close to Him. Can you picture yourself sitting in that chair, instead of the teddy bear? Let God love ON You.
Whatever You're Doing by Sanctus Real
It's time for healing time to move on
It's time to fix what's been broken too long
Time to make right what has been wrong
It's time to find my way to where I belong
There's a wave that's crashing over me
And all I can do is surrender
(Chorus)Whatever You're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but somehow there's peace
It's hard to surrender to what I can't see
but I'm giving in to something Heavenly
Time for a milestone Time to begin again
Reevaluate who I really am
Am I doing everything to follow Your will
Or just climbing aimlessly over these hills
So show me what it is You want from me
I give everything I surrender...
Time to face up Clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out
That I've wanted to say for so many years
Time to release all my held back tears
Whatever You're doing inside of me it feels like chaos
but I believeYou're up to something bigger than me
Larger than life something Heavenly
Monday, August 11, 2008
The Average Jane Journal #12 - Heart, Not Politics
“If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from Heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” II Chronicles 7:14
Yes, I know I have written on this verse before; but I just can’t get away from it. The last couple of days my heart has been heavy thinking about the condition of our country. I don’t like talking politics, and I know it’s a first reaction to think it’s politics when the subject of our country is brought up. But to me, it’s more of a faith related topic-a heart condition of our country; and not just our heart, but God’s broken heart.
I’m just going to be open and vulnerable here-does anyone else ever get overwhelmed at ALL the many things that need prayer in our country today? I feel that way a lot lately. The past year or so my heart has started mourning a little more everyday at the decline of our country’s heart. I have signed up for numerous daily emails letting me know what is going on in the political realm of things. I get a daily email with a prayer for me to pray about the upcoming Presidential election. And I have to be honest, the information is so overwhelming.
My mind has been non stop the last few days. As some of you know I attended the Willow Creek Leadership Summit, via satellite on Thursday and Friday. You can’t help but come home pumped up from that, and I was/am. That night I received an email that some of you might have seen going around. It’s from a woman that went to a conference and one of the speakers was Kay Arthur, a very respectable Christian speaker. The author of the email wanted everyone to know how awesome the conference was, and how Kay Arthur said she feels like God told her that our country was headed for a physical famine. The woman’s heart was sincere and passionate that everyone start praying for our nation. My first reaction was fear, I would respect something from Kay Arthur. And I even sat down to journal on the email, with a copy of the email attached. Something was telling me to check it out and see if it was true. So I researched it, and found a letter from Kay Arthur on her website saying that it is not what she said. She actually said that we, as Americans, are setting ourselves for famine. She gave examples of cost of foods going up, and crops being destroyed by weather. She was making a point that famine is one of the judgments God uses when His people turn from Him. (Ezekiel 14:12-20) I don’t believe the author of the email meant any disrespect to Kay Arthur, she was being sincere with what she thought was said and wanted people to know about it.
While I was glad to hear that she had not had a prophecy, I also knew it could happen; I don’t doubt it at all.
I read from the Old Testament almost every day and the whole theme is pretty much how the Israelites(God’s chosen people) would screw up, cry out to God, God save them, they follow God sincerely for awhile, then the cycle starts all over again. There are many prophets, judges, etc that God uses to keep His people in line; but a lot of the times they do not listen to them. There is usually punishment of some type when they turn from God.
So I start wondering, can we relate to God’s chosen people? Can we read the Old Testament and put our country in the story or is all that only for them at that time? I believe, since Jesus came, that all Believers are now God’s chosen people. I believe that before Jesus, God’s chosen people were by descent-physical birth. But now we are by spiritual birth, so I think that makes us God’s chosen people now.
God hated all the “ugliness” that was going on that the Israelites got themselves into. They would abandon God’s ways and allow detestable things to go on in their country. We have detestable things going on in our country. I can just imagine God looking down on us, and with a heavy, broken heart shake His head. That saddens me, and also convicts me because a lot of times I feel like nothing can be done; that the decline is already so far advanced, that I feel like it can’t be stopped.
So then that brings me back to the verse, am I :
Humbling myself?
Praying?
Seeking God’s face?
Turning from my wicked ways?
I guess it boils down to, do we believe God can do anything? What would happen if we become a humbled country? And remember all the things listed above have to happen by Believers-not non Believers. They do not have the Holy Spirit to guide them in the right ways. This is God rallying all His chosen people to come back to Him.
That gets me to thinking, most of you if asked would say we are in the “end times” or getting close. Most Believers assume that because of the decline of things. But what if we’re not? (I’m not saying I know that, I’m just talking out loud.) What if this is one of those times where God’s chosen people cry out to God in unity and God “changes” the outcome. I know that is a subject all in itself. When something like that happens in the Bible, my first thought is “didn’t God know that was going to happen anyway, so He didn’t really change His mind, did He???”. I’m not going to pretend I understand all the ways of God.
I’m just saying what IF we do humble ourselves and in a situation where our country might be headed for punishment, our sincere hearts fill up God’s heart with so much joy that we have a revival in this country? What if when other countries, that have either turned from God’s ways or just never had His ways, when they are falling apart-our country stands back up, on righteousness??? Wouldn’t that be the ultimate in bringing God glory!!! He wants to bless His people!!!
So my prayer for our country is that God makes us hungry for peace(from sin) and grant us hope to see this land we love be healed. We are known as a land of freedom, but that freedom comes through God ultimately. I don’t want to live in a land where God lets others rule us, others that are against God. Do you? Do you want a revival in our land?
So politics aside, the answer is II Chronicles 7:14.
God in this City
by Chris Tomlin
You're the God of this city You're the King of these people
You're the Lord of this nation You Are
For there is no one like our God There is no one like our God
Chorus 1:
Greater things have yet to comeGreat things are still to be doneIn this city
Greater things are still to comeAnd greater things are still to be done here
Verse 2:
You're the Lord of Creation The Creator of all things
You're the King above all Kings You Are
You're the strength in our weakness You're the love to the broken
You're the joy in the sadness You Are
Chorus 2:
Greater things have yet to comeGreat things are still to be doneIn this city
Where glory shines from hearts aliveWith praise for you and love for youIn this city
Greater things have yet to comeGreat things are still to be doneIn this city
Greater things are still to comeAnd greater things are still to be done here
Yes, I know I have written on this verse before; but I just can’t get away from it. The last couple of days my heart has been heavy thinking about the condition of our country. I don’t like talking politics, and I know it’s a first reaction to think it’s politics when the subject of our country is brought up. But to me, it’s more of a faith related topic-a heart condition of our country; and not just our heart, but God’s broken heart.
I’m just going to be open and vulnerable here-does anyone else ever get overwhelmed at ALL the many things that need prayer in our country today? I feel that way a lot lately. The past year or so my heart has started mourning a little more everyday at the decline of our country’s heart. I have signed up for numerous daily emails letting me know what is going on in the political realm of things. I get a daily email with a prayer for me to pray about the upcoming Presidential election. And I have to be honest, the information is so overwhelming.
My mind has been non stop the last few days. As some of you know I attended the Willow Creek Leadership Summit, via satellite on Thursday and Friday. You can’t help but come home pumped up from that, and I was/am. That night I received an email that some of you might have seen going around. It’s from a woman that went to a conference and one of the speakers was Kay Arthur, a very respectable Christian speaker. The author of the email wanted everyone to know how awesome the conference was, and how Kay Arthur said she feels like God told her that our country was headed for a physical famine. The woman’s heart was sincere and passionate that everyone start praying for our nation. My first reaction was fear, I would respect something from Kay Arthur. And I even sat down to journal on the email, with a copy of the email attached. Something was telling me to check it out and see if it was true. So I researched it, and found a letter from Kay Arthur on her website saying that it is not what she said. She actually said that we, as Americans, are setting ourselves for famine. She gave examples of cost of foods going up, and crops being destroyed by weather. She was making a point that famine is one of the judgments God uses when His people turn from Him. (Ezekiel 14:12-20) I don’t believe the author of the email meant any disrespect to Kay Arthur, she was being sincere with what she thought was said and wanted people to know about it.
While I was glad to hear that she had not had a prophecy, I also knew it could happen; I don’t doubt it at all.
I read from the Old Testament almost every day and the whole theme is pretty much how the Israelites(God’s chosen people) would screw up, cry out to God, God save them, they follow God sincerely for awhile, then the cycle starts all over again. There are many prophets, judges, etc that God uses to keep His people in line; but a lot of the times they do not listen to them. There is usually punishment of some type when they turn from God.
So I start wondering, can we relate to God’s chosen people? Can we read the Old Testament and put our country in the story or is all that only for them at that time? I believe, since Jesus came, that all Believers are now God’s chosen people. I believe that before Jesus, God’s chosen people were by descent-physical birth. But now we are by spiritual birth, so I think that makes us God’s chosen people now.
God hated all the “ugliness” that was going on that the Israelites got themselves into. They would abandon God’s ways and allow detestable things to go on in their country. We have detestable things going on in our country. I can just imagine God looking down on us, and with a heavy, broken heart shake His head. That saddens me, and also convicts me because a lot of times I feel like nothing can be done; that the decline is already so far advanced, that I feel like it can’t be stopped.
So then that brings me back to the verse, am I :
Humbling myself?
Praying?
Seeking God’s face?
Turning from my wicked ways?
I guess it boils down to, do we believe God can do anything? What would happen if we become a humbled country? And remember all the things listed above have to happen by Believers-not non Believers. They do not have the Holy Spirit to guide them in the right ways. This is God rallying all His chosen people to come back to Him.
That gets me to thinking, most of you if asked would say we are in the “end times” or getting close. Most Believers assume that because of the decline of things. But what if we’re not? (I’m not saying I know that, I’m just talking out loud.) What if this is one of those times where God’s chosen people cry out to God in unity and God “changes” the outcome. I know that is a subject all in itself. When something like that happens in the Bible, my first thought is “didn’t God know that was going to happen anyway, so He didn’t really change His mind, did He???”. I’m not going to pretend I understand all the ways of God.
I’m just saying what IF we do humble ourselves and in a situation where our country might be headed for punishment, our sincere hearts fill up God’s heart with so much joy that we have a revival in this country? What if when other countries, that have either turned from God’s ways or just never had His ways, when they are falling apart-our country stands back up, on righteousness??? Wouldn’t that be the ultimate in bringing God glory!!! He wants to bless His people!!!
So my prayer for our country is that God makes us hungry for peace(from sin) and grant us hope to see this land we love be healed. We are known as a land of freedom, but that freedom comes through God ultimately. I don’t want to live in a land where God lets others rule us, others that are against God. Do you? Do you want a revival in our land?
So politics aside, the answer is II Chronicles 7:14.
God in this City
by Chris Tomlin
You're the God of this city You're the King of these people
You're the Lord of this nation You Are
For there is no one like our God There is no one like our God
Chorus 1:
Greater things have yet to comeGreat things are still to be doneIn this city
Greater things are still to comeAnd greater things are still to be done here
Verse 2:
You're the Lord of Creation The Creator of all things
You're the King above all Kings You Are
You're the strength in our weakness You're the love to the broken
You're the joy in the sadness You Are
Chorus 2:
Greater things have yet to comeGreat things are still to be doneIn this city
Where glory shines from hearts aliveWith praise for you and love for youIn this city
Greater things have yet to comeGreat things are still to be doneIn this city
Greater things are still to comeAnd greater things are still to be done here
The Average Jane Journal #11 - My King

I have always loved movies that are set in a time period where there is a king. I just watched one last week and was wondering why these type of movies interest me. There is always great sacrifice and great love, and there is ALWAYS duty and honor shown from the people that love their king. Of course, the majority of times the “good” wins in the end.
Then an awesome comparison occurred to me. I do have a King, and He has given a great sacrifice and shown great love for his kingdom. And you know what? The “good” WILL win in the end. The problem is-am I showing my King duty and honor?
In those movies that I love the king always has a select group of men that know him intimately, and is privy to all information regarding their king. They go wherever he goes and show great honor and duty in living for their king-whom they love and believe in. They listen to his commands and seek his guidance. And they stand up to anyone and anything that goes against their king. They always show great bravery and courage, and there is always some sort of battle in these movies. I’m not always into the battle and bloodshed, but love the brave hearts these men have for their king.
Our King also has a group of people that know Him intimately, Believers. Our King desires for us to know Him and live for Him. Are we showing duty and honor by standing up for Him and any sort of “evil” that goes against Him? What battles are we not fighting? I know that we are not in our eternal kingdom yet, but this is the kingdom that we have for now and in my opinion the “walls are crumbling”. And that convicts me, because I know there is so much wrong today but do I ever speak out against it? Most of the time I am missing that brave heart that the king’s men in the movies show. I desire to have spiritual duty and honor for my King. I have to pray for help in this matter. Usually my mindset is that the issues I don’t like are too big, and have too much support that there is nothing that can happen.
But then while pondering on all this God opened my eyes through a quote and then a Bible scripture that reminded me that “GOOD” is always here. Our King is always here to lead us through all battles, but His people have to SEEK Him and His guidance.
“Natural(non believers) persons have no means by which to be truly victorious over sin. They are driven solely by their own natures. We should not be surprised at the depravity that surrounds us. I am somewhat puzzled by a common attitude in today’s church. We believe that abortion clinics, godless school districts, pornographers and the like are the hindrances to revival in our land. God expects unredeemed people to sin. Revival has nothing to do with unsaved people. If God’s people would humble themselves, pray, seek His face, and turn from their wicked ways, then this nation would be healed in spite of every bar, every gambling hall, every gang, and every crack house.” (Beth Moore)
2 Chronicles 7:14
“ if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.”
The Average Jane Journal #10 - Satan's Garage Sale
Satan's Garage Sale
Once upon a time, Satan was having a garage sale. There, standing in little groups were all of his bright, shiny trinkets. Here were tools that make it easy to tear others down for use as stepping stones. And over there were some lenses for magnifying ones own importance, which, if you looked through them the other way, you could also use to belittle others, or even one's self. Against the wall was the usual assortment of gardening implements guaranteed to help your pride grow by leaps and bounds: the rake of scorn, the shovel of jealousy for digging a pit for your neighbor, the tools of gossip and backbiting, of selfishness and apathy. All of these were pleasing to the eye and came complete with fabulous promises and guarantees of prosperity. Prices, of course, were steep; but not to worry! Free credit was extended to one and all. "Take it home, use it, and you won't have to pay until later!" old Satan cried, as he hawked his wares.The visitor, as he browsed, noticed two well worn, non-descript tools standing in one corner. Not being nearly as tempting as the other items, he found it curious that these two tools had price tags higher than any other. When he asked why, Satan just laughed and said, "Well, that's because I use them so much. If they weren't so plain looking, people might see them for what they were." Satan pointed to the two tools, saying, "You see, that one's Doubt and that one's Discouragement -- and those will work when nothing else will."
How does that story make you feel? It first made me see that I’m not the only one that gets tempted with doubt and discouragement. You see, most times I fail so badly with those two footholds that I get to feeling like I must be the only one. Second it makes me angry. Did you catch how those tools are “plain looking”? It makes me angry to think of satan having a good ole laugh when it comes to how many times he trips me up with these tools; how it’s so easy to make me doubt myself and God, and get so discouraged that it brings so many short “halts” in my spiritual walk.
As most of you know, the last year and a half has brought a new spiritual walk in my life. We all have things happen in our lives that brings on a “renewed, faster” walk with God. Even though those “happenings” were hard and painful, I am thankful for them. It has been an awesome part of my walk with God. Here on this earth, we will always be “walking”, but I’m closer to one of my many destinations on God’s itinerary for my journey.
One of those “happenings” is finding a new job. I don’t want to ramble on too much here, but most of you know that I feel like God has promised me a job; and that it will come through a way other than myself. I know it’s not the practical way to handle a job loss, but it’s my belief that it will happen in a way that will glorify God and not show my hand at all. Some days I do deal with doubt and discouragement though.
God has recently given me two verses to boost me and “stand back up”.
Romans 4:20-22 “Yet he(Abraham) did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised. This is why “it was credited to him as righteousness.”
I felt like God was telling me not to waver, to stay strong in His promise. I don’t know about you but I have trouble with holding myself worthy enough for God to either do something FOR me or THROUGH me. I was given another verse that helped me to remember how much God loves me.
Romans 8:32 “He who did not spare His own Son, but gave him up for us all-how will he not also, along with Him, graciously give us all things?”
The last few days I have been reminded to hold fast to God’s promise, and that there is nothing wrong with my sincere desire for this situation to only bring God glory. At Bible study on Friday I told my story to the ladies in that class, and a couple of them prayed for me and my desire. When I got home that day I had a message from a friend(thank you Sonya) with a job she had found in a paper and she thought of me. It might not be the job for me, but it shows me that God has not left, even when I doubt. I did apply for the job, and I am a little excited but I want only to be in God’s will so if it doesn’t happen; that is alright with me.
I hope you will remember the story at the beginning of this entry next time you’re dealing with doubt and discouragement. Just think of satan and how much he loves those tools. Remember how the fact they are so “plain looking” is the reason why they work. Get angry(in a good way) about it, and strive to keep a better lookout for those tools. Talk about it with God and express to Him your desire to quit falling over those footholds. From my own experience, it feels like something I will never conquer; but prayerfully the battles will be fewer and smaller.
Let me just say that these doubts I am talking about are doubts that lead you AWAY from God, not doubts/questions that lead you TO God.
Once upon a time, Satan was having a garage sale. There, standing in little groups were all of his bright, shiny trinkets. Here were tools that make it easy to tear others down for use as stepping stones. And over there were some lenses for magnifying ones own importance, which, if you looked through them the other way, you could also use to belittle others, or even one's self. Against the wall was the usual assortment of gardening implements guaranteed to help your pride grow by leaps and bounds: the rake of scorn, the shovel of jealousy for digging a pit for your neighbor, the tools of gossip and backbiting, of selfishness and apathy. All of these were pleasing to the eye and came complete with fabulous promises and guarantees of prosperity. Prices, of course, were steep; but not to worry! Free credit was extended to one and all. "Take it home, use it, and you won't have to pay until later!" old Satan cried, as he hawked his wares.The visitor, as he browsed, noticed two well worn, non-descript tools standing in one corner. Not being nearly as tempting as the other items, he found it curious that these two tools had price tags higher than any other. When he asked why, Satan just laughed and said, "Well, that's because I use them so much. If they weren't so plain looking, people might see them for what they were." Satan pointed to the two tools, saying, "You see, that one's Doubt and that one's Discouragement -- and those will work when nothing else will."
How does that story make you feel? It first made me see that I’m not the only one that gets tempted with doubt and discouragement. You see, most times I fail so badly with those two footholds that I get to feeling like I must be the only one. Second it makes me angry. Did you catch how those tools are “plain looking”? It makes me angry to think of satan having a good ole laugh when it comes to how many times he trips me up with these tools; how it’s so easy to make me doubt myself and God, and get so discouraged that it brings so many short “halts” in my spiritual walk.
As most of you know, the last year and a half has brought a new spiritual walk in my life. We all have things happen in our lives that brings on a “renewed, faster” walk with God. Even though those “happenings” were hard and painful, I am thankful for them. It has been an awesome part of my walk with God. Here on this earth, we will always be “walking”, but I’m closer to one of my many destinations on God’s itinerary for my journey.
One of those “happenings” is finding a new job. I don’t want to ramble on too much here, but most of you know that I feel like God has promised me a job; and that it will come through a way other than myself. I know it’s not the practical way to handle a job loss, but it’s my belief that it will happen in a way that will glorify God and not show my hand at all. Some days I do deal with doubt and discouragement though.
God has recently given me two verses to boost me and “stand back up”.
Romans 4:20-22 “Yet he(Abraham) did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised. This is why “it was credited to him as righteousness.”
I felt like God was telling me not to waver, to stay strong in His promise. I don’t know about you but I have trouble with holding myself worthy enough for God to either do something FOR me or THROUGH me. I was given another verse that helped me to remember how much God loves me.
Romans 8:32 “He who did not spare His own Son, but gave him up for us all-how will he not also, along with Him, graciously give us all things?”
The last few days I have been reminded to hold fast to God’s promise, and that there is nothing wrong with my sincere desire for this situation to only bring God glory. At Bible study on Friday I told my story to the ladies in that class, and a couple of them prayed for me and my desire. When I got home that day I had a message from a friend(thank you Sonya) with a job she had found in a paper and she thought of me. It might not be the job for me, but it shows me that God has not left, even when I doubt. I did apply for the job, and I am a little excited but I want only to be in God’s will so if it doesn’t happen; that is alright with me.
I hope you will remember the story at the beginning of this entry next time you’re dealing with doubt and discouragement. Just think of satan and how much he loves those tools. Remember how the fact they are so “plain looking” is the reason why they work. Get angry(in a good way) about it, and strive to keep a better lookout for those tools. Talk about it with God and express to Him your desire to quit falling over those footholds. From my own experience, it feels like something I will never conquer; but prayerfully the battles will be fewer and smaller.
Let me just say that these doubts I am talking about are doubts that lead you AWAY from God, not doubts/questions that lead you TO God.
The Average Jane Journal #9 - Densensitized

I have been convicted about something this week and I have felt led to write about it. I didn’t want to, but I try very hard to listen to any “heart tugs”, (after I fought it of course).
While doing some homework this week for my ladies Bible study(which I’m behind on), I was studying the death that Jesus went through. I was convicted that I just do not give enough respect to the pain and suffering He went through. Don’t get me wrong, I have always believed that He died and rose from the dead. But for some reason I always just glaze over the part about the pain He must have felt.
I felt like God was telling me to look closer at how His son died. He knows I believe it, but I don’t really think about how much He really suffered for me. I’m not saying that God wants me to be morbid and sad all the time, but just to be more thankful of the sacrifice; the actual ACT. I know some people think that IF He is God than He could have went to the cross and felt nothing. But that’s not how it was, He had to suffer to cover all our sins.
I think that sometimes in our spiritual walk that God’s Word can become so familiar to us, that we may get a little desensitized to it. And for me, that’s especially true since I have been raised in church all my life. God showed me I take for granted what Jesus did for me, at least the suffering part of it. I was talking to a friend about this subject and she compared it to the stuff we put up with in our world today, like stuff on tv and movies, etc. We just become familiar with it and sometimes we lose our passion over it. So maybe that’s a better way to put it, I didn’t have a passion for that part of the story anymore.
I know even in everyday life, I don’t want to hear any stories about suffering. I never watch the news, I just don’t want to be faced with sad stuff. But when it comes to what my Redeemer did for me-I needed to stop and meditate on just how big a gift I have been given.
I went back and read in Matthew, Mark, Luke and John-the parts that tell of Jesus’ arrest, questioning, abuse & mocking, and death. Jesus suffered for us, He bore shame and disgrace.
I know this is all stuff we hear every Easter Sunday, but again I have gotten desensitized to it. I don’t want this to come across as lack of faith, it is not. I believe everything in the Bible. I just need to watch what I take for granted.
This entry subject might not apply to you, and I hope it doesn’t. It’s quite shameful for me to come to grips with this-it’s such an important part of our faith. But maybe there are other things you have become desensitized to-whether it’s something in God’s Word or something in the world that we put up with and we have lost our passion about. I pray that you will be encouraged to search your heart for those things.
Love to all,
Average Jane
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